Customs & Driver, Smoking and The English Language

Customs and Driver

Back from London and the 1st task is to go to the storage depot to meet the customs official at 10.30am, an hour an a half away from the Halcyon. Hard when your body doesn't have a clue where you are nor what time it is. I arrive at 10.20am, it's rude to be late for an appointment. Customs offical doesn't seem to think so doesn't turn up until 11.15am. That's 55 minutes of sitting on plastic chair outside the warehouse being plagued by flies, stared at by the warehouse workers with nothing to read but the map of Bangalore (which I have 'read' a few times already). I should maybe become an auto-rickshaw driver, I know the city better than they do (as confirmed by the auto driver who drove us round in a circle for an extra 15mins looking for a well-known street.) While waiting, one of the taxi drivers from before I left for London called to ask again if he could be employed as our driver. All the staff at the Halcyon have asked me now if they can be our driver, maid, cook, security guard etc. I'd want out of the Halcyon too if I were them, the lack of natural light is really disorientating. Either that or the pay is rubbish. Probably both. It seems I haven't quite mastered the art of phone conversation openings in India.

Phone rings:

Amy "Hello?"
Driver "Hello"
At this point people normally introduce themselves, and say why they are calling.
Amy "...."
Amy "Hello?"
Driver "Hello"
Amy "Hello"
Driver "Hello"

This could go on forever

Amy "Hello, this is Amy"
Driver "Hello"

GOOD GRIEF

Amy "Hello, can I help?"
Driver "Calling for job"

At this point I explain 5 times that we don't have a car yet and that we're still in temporary accomodation. When we do move out and get a car I will be in touch. Getting out of the conversation was a lot easier than starting it up! After I hung up I rememebered that people normally answer the phone " Hello, tell me." I'm going to do that from now on.

Finally the customs offical arrives, I stand up to shake his hand and introduce myself.

"Hello, I'm Amy, nice to meet you."

"Sit" he retorts and walks straight past me. Hmmm, I think Customs Officials are not as friendly as all other Indians I've met so far.

Then I watch as all our belongings still in their packing boxes are taken out of the container, opened up and rumaged through by a pack of young boys. They didn't seem to notice the 'Fragile' stickers on some of the boxes - which led to me jumping up off the plastic chair (which gives short respite from the flies) to ask them to be careful, which they luckily seemed to understand. All the while really hoping that all our underwear came with us in the air shipment.

It seems that stacking chairs is not a universal techinique. Watching the boys trying to stack our dining room chairs was hilarious. Maybe that's why we did the module 'Shape and Space' for Maths GCSE.

After a fair amount of poking around in our stuff, the Customs Official seemed satisfied. He wanted to know the exact value of our TV, BBQ, Wedding Present Crockery and Garden Table.

LUCKILY, I was really disorganised and didn't have my spreadsheet with the exact values with me. Having been met which such indifference, I thought it might be best to get the EXACT figures for him. I told him I'd call my husband (I've found that claiming to be a wee-wifey can help in certain situations) to check. Glad I did, as I took myself off, the relocation official followed me, tapped me on the shoulder and told me what they were worth, which was significantly less than the figures I had on my spreadsheet. I'm glad I didn't blurt out the actual value of the garden table etc, I think we might have had quite a lot of duty to pay. Hoping this doesn't come back to bite me on the bum later. We'll see.

Smoking

I have given up smoking.

It is miserable.

It has to be done.

It wasn't really planned very well. Scared myself by nearly killing someone in Bangalore airport on the way back to London due to nicotine deprivation. I bought nicotine gum at Boots in Terminal 5 on the way back to Bangalore to get me through the flight. Then thought that the gum might not be enough so bought a week's supply of full strength patches.

When I got back to Bangalore I had a cigarette as soon as I left the airport and immediately felt ill. Had another one when I arrived back at the Halcyon. Felt horrible again. Slept, woke up and decided to give the patches a go. Didn't tell Bas. Sat in the bathroom fighting with myself, a bit like the scene out of Sister Act when Whoopi Goldberg has to hand over a cheque for a significant amount to charity. Finally I slapped the patch on and then went to tell Bas (so I didn't rip it off straight away).

Now it's day 2 and I can't say it is fun. Day at a time - thank god I have never got into hard-core-mood-altering drugs, it's bloody hard fighting the cravings. At least I have a focus, it seems nicotine patches aren't available in Bangalore and with only a week's supply I need to make sure that I get some more! I've asked in about 5 or 6 Chemists, called about the same. Finally I've found a place that has them so hopefully I'll be able to carry on. Wish me luck. I need it. Especially after breakfast, lunch, dinner, before bed, when I get stressed, when I get upset, when I've got nothing better to do, in fact, every 2 hours or so....

The English Language

Bas' watch strap broke. It seems leather and sweat don't go well together. We have ordered a replacement from a shop. They emailed me today to let me know that one will be ready soon and that they wil contact me when it is. The English make me giggle, they will 'intimate' me when it arrives. Not the verb often used in English in that context. I love the way that English is used here, there are quite a few antiquated words used. I think my favourite is the bumper stickers on cars "Call this number if this car is driven rashly" This isn't so much a comment on the language (which I still like - 'rash' should be used a lot more) but the fact that ALL cars, buses, lorries, bikes and scooters in Bangalore are driven 'rashly' in my opinion!